reel in
my feelings?
no!
been there,
done that.
lost a seminal piece
of my femininity.
then, a new body.
we do not return
as we came.
bits of us fall away
over time.
we give them away
unconsciously
desperate
to simply
hold
on.
aging
ode to Caregivers
many reasons
the choice
to care
for another –
love,
guilt,
greed,
obligation,
tradition,
expectation.
regardless,
this work
takes much
in and from.
it tests patience
and frays boundaries,
can become
all encompassing
and, at times,
heartbreaking.
critical, caregiver,
to care for yourself
in equal measure.
fill your cup
to then pour from,
eat with abandon
to then feed
with boundless compassion.
.
🙏
.
❤️
stretching
don’t feel like
what I was
then
just yesterday.
body feels looser,
more spacious.
mind,
lighter
a little less judgment
and constriction.
heart
beats slower,
breaks faster,
heals
spontaneously.
all of me
stretching,
breaking agreements
defying parameters
that no longer fit.
maturity
settling in,
eldership,
dusk.
.
🙏🥰
.
expiration date
been thinking
and talking
about death
more
lately
within community
and in Solitude.
wondering
about
the expiration date
for this present
embodiment.
perhaps,
the prompt
for this contemplation
is an impending
“birth” day –
completion of
one cycle,
the beginning of another.
no guarantee
of continuing.
chronic
chronic fatigue
chronic dis-ease
no plans to go away
or for permanent relief
no cure
just management
by way of medicine.
what led to this chronic state
in the first place?
choices made against
memories suppressed
Individuality discouraged
dreams deferred
voices kept small
in a world 🌎 growing smaller
and louder?
where to contain it all
if not on the in-side?
summer
always so activating,
the summer months,
for me:
so much skin exposed,
flesh seemingly everywhere-
breasts
legs
midriffs
butt checks-
all as overwhelming
and stifling
as the humidity
and the heat
and that inner voice
incessant speak:
“cover up and hide,
yours is not a body
for display to the outside.”
Love, Now
In BeLoved relationship
now –
menopausal,
modern elder,
refined lines,
silvered hair.
More touch craved.
Intimacy curated.
Explorations of re-membered Souls.
Wanderings taken through dilated minds
and in bodies made soft, delicate
by the passage of time.
With gentle intentionality,
fierce penetration
catharsis
synchronization
of Hearts broken wide open repeatedly.
Conversations – rich, infinite, deep
while the wondrous sea
teases our entangled feet.
Meandering walks in The Untamed Woods,
silently communicating
as Kindreds are wont to do.
Nourished by
succulent food,
mystical tonics,
wild-crafted wines,
quiet evenings spent
luxuriously entwined
in sheer awe of The Big Sky.
A taste of Blessed Divinity at play:
you were always coming my way,
and I
preparing for you,
my wildest dreams
come true.
RED
Mixed emotions,
my relationship with Red–
the color of
sensuality and menstruation-
of sin and punishment-
as I was taught.
Red did not hide-
neither docile nor shy.
Red, to me,
embodied extroversion-
loud and insufferable!
Beginning,
in the latter chapter of life,
to warm to Red some-
to appreciate her contours
and taste her complexity.
She’s beckoning me, Red–
an invitation to finally
stand
firmly
in my Power.
“It’s always been there,”
Red says.
Change to Save
I will need to change my life
in order to save it.
This I am feeling to my very core.
Don’t know how much more
I can swallow.
I’m walkin’ on thin ice,
on troubled waters that are shallow.
Born an introvert, Quiet is the air I must breathe,
what sustains and maintains me.
Without adequate doses of silence,
I lose pieces,
become untethered,
cannot see a hopeful reality,
begin to question my existence
and that of all humanity.
Why all the noise –
the incessant chatter and mindless banter?
“Y’all gonna make me lose my mind
up in here, up in here.
Y’all gonna make me lose control
up in here, up in here.”
I will need to change my life
in order to save it.
Deprived of silence,
I feel my blood boiling,
heart racing,
hands tremblin’,
mind slipping.
I can taste that bitter, flimsy line
between love and hate;
that soft, raw space
where even the gentlest among us
can suddenly snap
and do things we can never take back.
The Devil isn’t over there-
No, it plays in us all
bidding we follow
and fall-
fall so hard and low,
we can barely stand up.
I will need to change my life,
re-claim it
in order to save it.
Exactly how to do so
overwhelms and scares –
the tide is seemingly so high.
Got to go deep inside,
to The Core
lean only on that which is Truth and pure.
Another Year
Twelve months,
fifty-two weeks
three hundred sixty-five days,
eight thousand seven hundred sixty hours,
five hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes–
gone
over
done.
A door is closing,
another is opening.
A time for reflection,
a clean slate.
Lessons learned,
goals to re-make.
We know what was
and wonder as to what will be.
What will spill over
from last year to this?
What and who will give way,
create space
for something
new
unexpected
completely transformative?
A mystery, the New Year;
seems to come sooner and sooner
with each passing year-
little time to catch one’s breath
before it’s on to the next!
Perhaps, a good thing,
this perceived speed
with which the years roll by-
less thinking
and worrying,
more being
and accepting.
What will be, will be.
We cannot control
what is destiny.
On the cusp
of a New Year,
we set intentions
and then
humbly
release them,
surrendering all;
taking it
breath by deep breath
minute by precious minute.
Living
fully
in every moment as
hours grow into days,
days become weeks,
weeks give way to months.
And
suddenly
we begin again
and anew.
burgeoninc 