We Fall Down

I forget –

often –

just how much I am privileged

and blessed,

allowing The Darkness to rise

and My Light to then subside.

Ironically,

gratitude never ceases,

it remains steadfast,

knowing this resurrected Shadow shall too pass.

Surrendering,

I will remember:

we fall down,

become lost,

and are –

eventually –

re-found.

Letting go,

I slowly begin to dissolve

that desperate,

terribly frightened façade.

Breathing deeply

and in-tentionally,

re-leasing lineages of conditioning

and very old stories,

the tight knots

in heart and belly

begin to relax,

they unwind.

I return –

once again –

to some humble

Presence of mind.

EXPECTATIONS

expectations:
we all have them-
conscious or not-
they exist
forming the foundation
upon which
we build a life.

there is a sense of security
in expectations,
a perception of control and order,
a bit of a path seen and set.

when expectations come crumbling down-
existential crisis settles within.
we no longer see the Point, let alone the road!
disoriented and ego-bruised,
we reel –
must establish new, different, and improved expectations
quickly
to become tethered again – or so we like to believe.

prayers to you

what’s it all about,
you coming into
this scared space
spewing your hate?
why not go outside
to the streets
into the Light –
strong and proud
expressing as you perceive:
that only white lives matter
all people of color
have “it” coming
that their lives mean nothing.
prayers to you,
for you truly know not
what it is you do.
you have forgotten
what You really are;
alas, you can see but so far-
only to the level of the skin
so utterly limited you are,
tightly constricted
unseen, likely never really heard,
lonely in your Little Box
amidst your tribe
of hardened have nots.
from such profound lack,
you shame and blame
easily kill and maim,
desperately looking outside
for what does not exist within.
no present capacity to self-reflect
nor the tools to adequately take stock
and practice personal responsibility.
fervent prayers for the lost pieces of you-
may you soon re-member and awaken.

 

Sacred Moment

this strange,
sudden
lonely
traumatic
seclusion.
A particularly fierce form of Grace.
All a bit of a blur-
so much has taken place
as revealed by this now wizened face.
Innocence gained and lost
as we endeavor to make the most
of what is truly a Sacred Moment
a pause, a break, space
for resurrection and metamorphosis.
Who will come of this?
Already feeling familiar pieces
falling away – cannot retrieve them
for there is no going back-
only surrender –
a radical submission,
to humility and a facile generosity
born from the remembrance
of our connectedness
and shared ancestry.

RED

Mixed emotions,
my relationship with Red
the color of
sensuality and menstruation-
of sin and punishment-
as I was taught.
Red did not hide-
neither docile nor shy.
Red, to me,
embodied extroversion-
loud and insufferable!
Beginning,
in the latter chapter of life,
to warm to Red some-
to appreciate her contours
and taste her complexity.
She’s beckoning me, Red
an invitation to finally
stand
firmly
in my Power.
It’s always been there,”
Red says.

Mask

Alas,
how is this suppose to work
now and going forward?
Vulnerability,
the removal of our masks –
invisible and heavy-
had just become
more comfortable
for so many.
Now,
suddenly,
the mask-
sterile and tangible-
has become
mandatory.
A rare treat
to see a naked face
walking down a street.
We’ve become aliens
out of necessity,
orbiting around each other,
getting no closer
to the “stranger”
that six feet.

Holding Space

holding space
resonates for me
deeper than
simply taking up space.
giver,
an easier fit than that of
receiver.
a calling to serve
with me since birth.
compelled to leave an imprint
to help make our world a little
better and kinder;
to mirror back to people
their best self, their good seeds
offering that which was not
always reflected to me.
And so, I hold space,
co-creating an expansive
and porous container-
a Welcome mat
a soft place to breathe,
to grow, to change.
A space that also
expands and contracts-
as intimate as the womb or a cocoon
and as wide as the night’s sky-
whatever the healing yearns for,
I hold The Space.

Penni

Dear Penni,
do re-member
Who You Are!
Do not allow
the scorn and
insecurity
of others
diminish Your Light,
trigger self-doubt,
leaving you so stressed
the right side of your face
is trembling,
eyes lowered filling with tears,
posture folded in,
appetite lost,
feeling unappreciated
and misunderstood.
Do re-member
Who You Are!
Our world needs your
shine and smile.
There’s also
a husband
and children
to consider –
your priorities,
above all else –
most especially-
the work
you abhor
that elicits
such a degree
of distress
you can lo longer ignore.
Re-member
Who You Really are-
see You
through You.

The Wall

I hit The Wall
today;
ran right into it –
mind, body and Spirit – splat!
Hit it so hard,
the tears came
tumbling down,
suddenly,
out of seemingly nowhere.
A deluge –
in public no less!
“What is this?” I cried,
trying desperately
to cover and hide.
A rare occurrence
for me-
losing control,
forced to surrender,
pause,
look,
pivot
and reconsider
choices made,
examine
subconscious motivations,
and
the allowance
of subtle intimidation.

Grieve Well

there will always be
reasons to Grieve:
some pain
some joy
a passing
transition
transformation;

something is
birthed
unfamiliar
uncomfortable
new.

what was known,
no longer is.
there is loss,
an opportunity to grieve
to metabolize grief
to break it down to digestible pieces
and reconfigure into
gratitude
acceptance
presence
wisdom
courage
a remembrance that no thing stays the same.

change, death –
both seen and unseen –
is constant.

Grieve well
let go
so as to fully
let in
through
out.

No blockages
no limitations.

What remains?
spaciousness
for manifestations.