death

LIFE (scene two)

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LIFE

can seem insane.
So many of us are unable
to withstand its pain.
We do our best to live,
to contribute
to a world
constantly changing
and maddening.

Still, through it all
some of us manage not to fall.
Like a seedling
making its way up through concrete,
we spread our wings,
we plant our feet.
We’ve found our place;
we are lauded and celebrated.

But then-
in the blink of an eye,
an “apparent suicide“.

What happened?!
What went wrong?!
Does not success
bring with it sustained happiness?
What of us
for whom no one makes a fuss,
who daily squeeze into an overcrowded bus
to a job that leaves us empty and numb?
If the “extra-ordinary” so regularly succumb,
how then does the “ordinary” overcome?

“The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation…” Henry David Thoreau, Walden

An Untold Story

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buried deep
inside,
a part of self
wishing only
to hide,
preferring to
“live”
a lie.
how to see
it
let alone speak
it–
that,
which altered
a Life.
innocence
forever lost,
a new trajectory
is now forced.

but not
without
a heavy cost.

one can only run
from The Truth
but so far
before it
festers and scars.
An untold story
will travel from life to life,
causing all matters
of angst and strife
until it is
revealed,
brought
finally
to the Light.

 

LIFE (scene One)

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Live

Life

Full.

Be

Here

Now.

For, one never knows

when,

how

The Plug

will be pulled.

Tomorrow,

the next breath,

never guaranteed-

from that illusion,

we must all

be freed.

Life is

precious,

precarious.

The human body,

fragile

as it is

miraculous.

Take

no thing,

no one

for granted.

Live

Life

Soft–

surrendered,

empathetic.

Advent

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A time spent

in deep contemplation,

in preparation

for what God

to the world

sent:

A Love Divine

came from up high

to make fully flesh

The Word;

to demonstrate

prayers are indeed heard

and prophesies fulfilled

as per His time

and perfect will.

Emmanuel-

Hallelujah,

our God dwells

among us all!

Born humbly

in the House of Bread,

He came to save,

to minister,

to transform

the thoughts

the darkness

residing, hiding

in our head,

imploring we chose-

instead-

only Love

only Light

-always

until the end

of our human days.

 

Circles of Life

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No beginning,

no real end,

around we go

again and again.

No thing is created,

nor ever truly destroyed.

All comes back, newly restored.

We say goodbye,

only to soon again say hi.

The illusion of lost,

it feels so real;

yet, is such a lie.

Bonds are never broken,

no way,

no how.

“‘Tis the truth,” they say,

those who have woken,

who heed the subtle cues

and disorienting déjà vu;

those who can see through and beneath,

well beyond this realm,

who venture down deep,

then back up to tell

the Story of Life,

its circular path

of ash from ash,

of I in you and you in me

and Life’s beautiful infinity.

“The story of life is quicker than the wink of an eye, the story of love is hello and goodbye…until we meet again.” ― Jimi Hendrix

 

 

 

Another Life: Dream One

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The next incarnation of Me,

I foresee

three darling babies

to whom

I am

doting, dutiful mommy.

Each said man-child

from my womb

shall come,

manifestations

of a long-held covenant

finally

exhumed.

 

In this other Life,

to an extraordinary Soul,

I will serve many roles:

His first lover,

babies’ mother,

forever friend and wife.

A beautiful home

together we build,

me and my boys,

filled with the Love and Light

we pray and persistently will-

cups so runneth over

that unto the world

our joy spills.

Eleven Years

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On the sixth day in the month of September of the year 2005:

A cell phone rings.

“It is your father,”

says the somber mother

to the busy daughter.

“He has been taken

to hospital…a stroke.”

 

Eleven years ago,

my Pop transitioned;

he left body

and went to Heaven.

One is never prepared for death-

especially that of a parent.

You know it will come eventually,

makes sense intellectually;

a matter to run from emotionally.

The day before he was to die,

he kept calling my cell line.

Over and over, he tried.

too tired and busy was I.

“I’ll call him tomorrow,”

I thought, fully justified;

not knowing he would not then

be alive.

Did Pop sense

his time had come?

Is there something he needed to tell

his eldest one?

What did I miss in

missing his call?

Did he go

thinking

I cared not at all?

Along with grief,

from guilt I found little relief.

Over and over,

in my mind,

I wrestled with my use of time.

Questioned my responsibilities:

Were they aligned with my priorities?

Eleven years later,

older,

a tad wiser,

I can begin

to myself forgive.

We do our best

in the moments we live.

Perfection, not the final goal.

Missteps, falls –

a part of it all.

Lessons learned

in his life and death-

Thank you Father!

No more regrets.

 

 

 

Deep calls unto Deep

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such is when

Kindreds meet.

Deep calls unto Deep

when one cannot sleep

there is a yearning

as one is tossing

and turning.

Inside,

the child weeps.

Deep calls unto Deep

A dearly departed

snatches your heart,

tears it tenderly apart,

then captures your Soul

to make forever

free and bold.

Deep calls unto Deep

A majestic old tree,

an elephant resplendent

in its quiet dignity,

wondrous seas,

birth of little babies,

the birds and the bees.

All miracles,

they are

as the moon and the stars.

Look up and about,

Nature beseeches,

life so sweet

and utterly brief.

Deep calls unto Deep

 

 

judgement Monkey

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jumping around

all upside my head

screaming

hollerin’

just plain carrying on.

“please go back to bed;

leave me the hell alone!”

i said.

you ignored me-

as usual-

instead.

determined to take over my mind;

to, again,

turn me against me,

cruel and unkind.

won’t let you, Monkey-

no, not this time!

for I am determined to see–

to see you.

to see Truth.

won’t let you drive me

back to that Abyss.

no, this time Monkey,

you will cease to exist!

i am determined to see

differently,

to be free of Monkey,

believe in me steeped in He.

to go toward the Light,

know all’s alright,

that this too shall pass,

for nothing ever lasts.