nervous,
proceed anyway –
breathing,
praying 🙏
hands sweaty, voice trembling,
do it!
that thing
on your Heart
for decades –
perhaps even lifetimes.
the irritant in your Soul
that simply
will not
leave you alone,
begging you
to Rise,
rooted
firmly
in yourself,
your dharma,
your imagination,
in forces far beyond
your comprehension.
life
Luminous Things
bright,
smart Beings,
they don’t stay
they inevitably fly away.
why?
what of the conditions –
the soil,
the ethos –
here, now
discourage commitment
inspire flight?
perhaps,
a misalignment of values?
a sense of directionlessness?
a desire for a bit more
stability and community?
all this and more,
trusting an instinct
to Go
Now
and explore.
Luminous Things await
on fear’s other side!
Freedom
A woman who chooses
to Be
without a Partner,
quickly comes to understand
the importance of
her self-confidence.
Dancing with Life-
amidst the moments of strife,
she counts her blessings,
remains attuned
to her endless lessons.
She sees the beauty in it all,
answers a resounding Yes
to Life’s clarion calls!
She breathes in
and through
when moments of loneliness
ensue,
knowing that this too
shall past,
darkness for long never last.
Peace
is made
with her perceived
regrets –
dates not taken,
suitors not met.
She cultivates
an ever deepening faith
in her Journey’s course
and perfect pace.
Less judgement,
more acceptance.
Less attitude,
more gratitude.
A commitment is made
to soften her Heart,
to come from a place
of compassion
from the start.
She believes that
all is as it was planned to be,
no conspiracy
nor great tragedy.
She does not
herself
deem unworthy,
too unsightly
to attract
suitable opportunities
for luscious intimacy.
Rather, in reality,
an unconventional beauty
is she,
one that cannot be seen
so readily
through the current lens
of the vast majority.
She is unencumbered
and free –
free to be completely she
in all her raw,
sexy,
phenomenal
glory!
Free to fly,
to touch beyond the sky,
swim beneath the sea,
turn water to wine –
all in service to humankind.
fifty-seven
57 turns around The Sun,
over 700 hundred moons –
grateful, pensive
this year,
less celebratory.
Surprised
– as always –
by the outpouring
of Love,
sweet remembering
amidst so much suffering.
Sitting in a Liminal Space,
I am
here
now,
at a Threshold,
change
yet again!
A new chapter,
a different field,
a call to Be
more of Me –
The Original Face
before all the conditioning.
A pull to follow
my unique BluePrint,
to keep spreading these
Considerable Wings 🪽
to Leap into the perceived
Unknown,
to risk all
whilst also remaining
somewhat
grounded.
Difficulty at the Beginning.
Yes!
Feel it!
Breathe it!
Choose
to Trust,
to Create,
to Live
without understanding Life,
to follow your Heart ❤️
annihilation
death.
annihilation.
trans-formation.
no going back,
a time to grieve,
to let go
to let it burn 🔥
it – that which was
and can no longer
be
here
now.
a new identity awaits,
must allow the old
to gently fall away.
scared?
yes, petrified
standing
naked
at yet another Threshold.
where am I going?
where is my Songline leading?
skin shedding,
ancestral beliefs rising –
disempowerment,
unworthiness,
scarcity
the possibility of not living
to full potentiality.
that story ends
here
now
with me,
with fervent prayers,
with aligned community,
with Trust and surrender
day by day,
breath by deep breath,
re-leasing,
re-membering.
sweetness
not enough
then
suddenly
too much!
something missing
what?
a yearning
for sweetness,
release
from discipline,
a tipping point
of sorts,
can no longer run
or hide
sadness
disappointment
fear?
of what?
barely space
between internal stimulus
and its well-trodden response.
a mere taste
then
suddenly
the deluuge,
surrendering to the waterfall.
a deep
familiar
insatiable
hunger
for sweetness
presence
purpose
excitement
reasons
any
to be
here
now.
the fetus
innately worthy,
The Source,
from which we all
spring.
when do we forget
what we really are
and spiral
down
deep into The Abyss
of not enough
and the sense of
unworthiness?
grateful for those moments
in exquisite remembrance,
a glimpse,
swirls of pale pinks & greys,
the Curiousity of Creativity
condensing into form,
the fetus,
planted in a womb.
chilling
could not get warm,
could not sleep.
body stiff,
clinging to itself.
mind, racing;
heart, broken. 💔
parricide –
in what state of mind
is such a thing possible?
over and over and over
to rip into the flesh
that bore you,
to hear their cries,
screams,
pleas,
to feel their warm blood,
to witness
Life
leave the forms
from which you came.
chilling.
what we are capable of,
we, humans,
chilling.
the fragility of our psyche,
stunning.
we all walk on delicate ice
internally.
what is considered reality
can –
does –
suddenly
crack!
we fall in
deep,
become frozen.
and there
commit acts
so devastating
they ripple
far and wide. 😢
A Year-End Stream of Consciousness
Lack of attunement is what I am feeling acutely … a familiar feeling … is this the “norm” for a Life of The Unexpected? If it is, how do I navigate? With patience, with altruism, with totality, with anticipation, with simplicity, with authority, with humanity, with freshness, creativity, and the allowance for emergence, with integrity, with diplomacy – with all your innate gifts. In this Moment of agitation, unease, entropy – where do I lean? When you don’t know yet what to do, do nothing, be Still – isn’t that the message this whole year especially from Goddess Sige, who appeared multiple times to and for me? Not so easy, Silence/Stillness – why I consume and seek incessantly and rarely find…What have I found this year? What have I learned? How have I changed ingesting so much beauty-full richness? What has integrated? I don’t know yet … and will wait … be patience until called back into The Eternal Void … What is the invitation here and now? What am I to learn? What are the insights? Where am I deaf and blind? How to emerge from this victim consciousness? What is another story? An epiphany? The Quintessence? What is the practice of equality that bridges weakness to Tenderness? What is the resolve needed to transform exhaustion and the deep desire to just dis-appear to truly hear and live Divine Will? I don’t know yet …Stop seeking and find what? Peace? Community? Attunement? “Right” Livelihood? Home? Meaning? Abundance? Yes, to all please … Do I believe it to be true: all that is sought resides within? What’s inside of me? Who am I? Why am I here, now? I don’t know yet … When will I know for certain? Maybe upon the last breath.
dreams
what is
a dream
come true
for me?
what lies
over the Rainbow?
don’t know.
is that wrong?
feels so –
like some thing
missing,
a crucial piece
of a puzzle
glaring
it its absence.
hidden away,
perhaps,
some where deep
in side
waiting
patiently
for the right time.
“live the questions”
Rilke advised.
one day,
you’ll bump into
their answers.
