purpose

Freedom

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A woman who chooses

to Be

without a Partner,

quickly comes to understand

the importance of

her self-confidence.

Dancing with Life-

amidst the moments of strife,

she counts her blessings,

remains attuned

to her endless lessons.

She sees the beauty in it all,

answers a resounding Yes

to Life’s clarion calls!

She breathes in

and through

when moments of loneliness

ensue,

knowing that this too

shall past,

darkness for long never last.

Peace

is made

with her perceived

regrets –

dates not taken,

suitors not met.

She cultivates

an ever deepening faith

in her Journey’s course

and perfect pace.

Less judgement,

more acceptance.

Less attitude,

more gratitude.

A commitment is made

to soften her Heart,

to come from a place

of compassion

from the start.

She believes that

all is as it was planned to be,

no conspiracy

nor great tragedy.

She does not

herself

deem unworthy,

too unsightly

to attract

suitable opportunities

for luscious intimacy.

Rather, in reality,

an unconventional beauty

is she,

one that cannot be seen

so readily

through the current lens

of the vast majority.

She is unencumbered

and free –

free to be completely she

in all her raw,

sexy,

phenomenal

glory!

Free to fly,

to touch beyond the sky,

swim beneath the sea,

turn water to wine –

all in service to humankind.

sweetness

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not enough

then

suddenly

too much!

something missing

what?

a yearning 

for sweetness,

release

from discipline,

a tipping point

of sorts,

can no longer run

or hide

sadness

disappointment

fear?

of what?

barely space

between internal stimulus

and its well-trodden response.

a mere taste

then

suddenly

the deluuge,

surrendering to the waterfall.

a deep

familiar

insatiable

hunger

for sweetness

presence

purpose

excitement

reasons

any

to be

here

now.

been here before

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this place,

these people,

those words,

that feeling,

been here before.

The Benevolent Universe

slowly closing a door,

ushering in

something unfamiliar

far beyond my

imagination –

another assignment

an opportunity

to learn

to grow

to contribute

and explore

pieces of me

never seen before.

anticipation clasps the hand

of trepidation,

resistance gradually gives way

to acceptance

of a Journey

marked by the continuous

making

and then

the breaking

of bonds.

RED

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Mixed emotions,
my relationship with Red–
the color of
sensuality and menstruation-
of sin and punishment-
as I was taught.
Red did not hide-
neither docile nor shy.
Red, to me,
embodied extroversion-
loud and insufferable!
Beginning,
in the latter chapter of life,
to warm to Red some-
to appreciate her contours
and taste her complexity.
She’s beckoning me, Red–
an invitation to finally
stand
firmly
in my Power.
“It’s always been there,”
Red says.

Holding Space

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holding space
resonates for me
deeper than
simply taking up space.
giver,
an easier fit than that of
receiver.
a calling to serve
with me since birth.
compelled to leave an imprint
to help make our world a little
better and kinder;
to mirror back to people
their best self, their good seeds
offering that which was not
always reflected to me.
And so, I hold space,
co-creating an expansive
and porous container-
a Welcome mat
a soft place to breathe,
to grow, to change.
A space that also
expands and contracts-
as intimate as the womb or a cocoon
and as wide as the night’s sky-
whatever the healing yearns for,
I hold The Space.

Penni

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Dear Penni,
do re-member
Who You Are!
Do not allow
the scorn and
insecurity
of others
diminish Your Light,
trigger self-doubt,
leaving you so stressed
the right side of your face
is trembling,
eyes lowered filling with tears,
posture folded in,
appetite lost,
feeling unappreciated
and misunderstood.
Do re-member
Who You Are!
Our world needs your
shine and smile.
There’s also
a husband
and children
to consider –
your priorities,
above all else –
most especially-
the work
you abhor
that elicits
such a degree
of distress
you can lo longer ignore.
Re-member
Who You Really are-
see You
through You.

The Wall

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I hit The Wall
today;
ran right into it –
mind, body and Spirit – splat!
Hit it so hard,
the tears came
tumbling down,
suddenly,
out of seemingly nowhere.
A deluge –
in public no less!
“What is this?” I cried,
trying desperately
to cover and hide.
A rare occurrence
for me-
losing control,
forced to surrender,
pause,
look,
pivot
and reconsider
choices made,
examine
subconscious motivations,
and
the allowance
of subtle intimidation.

The Beat of One’s Own Drums

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to march to the beat of
One’s Own Drums,
to imitate no one,
to innovate 
from a place of deep faith
and confidence-
such a mandate
is not for
the faint
in Heart.

it takes courage 
to be free,
to be the You
that often only You can see,
to be unique, a bit of a mystique
in a world of followers and shamers.

we were made in God’s image,
reflections of The Divine, The Most High
one and onlys are we –
wonderfully crafted 
for a specific purpose and time.

the sake of humanity pleads:
spread your considerable wings!
march to the beat of your very own drums!
no need to compete,
there is more than enough room
for everyone.

Artwork: Walking the Line, Edwin Lester @artistedlester

LIFE (scene two)

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LIFE

can seem insane.
So many of us are unable
to withstand its pain.
We do our best to live,
to contribute
to a world
constantly changing
and maddening.

Still, through it all
some of us manage not to fall.
Like a seedling
making its way up through concrete,
we spread our wings,
we plant our feet.
We’ve found our place;
we are lauded and celebrated.

But then-
in the blink of an eye,
an “apparent suicide“.

What happened?!
What went wrong?!
Does not success
bring with it sustained happiness?
What of us
for whom no one makes a fuss,
who daily squeeze into an overcrowded bus
to a job that leaves us empty and numb?
If the “extra-ordinary” so regularly succumb,
how then does the “ordinary” overcome?

“The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation…” Henry David Thoreau, Walden

Change to Save

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I will need to change my life
in order to save it.

This I am feeling to my very core.
Don’t know  how much more
I can swallow.
I’m walkin’ on thin ice,
on troubled waters that are shallow.

Born an introvert, Quiet is the air I must breathe,
what sustains and maintains me.
Without adequate doses of silence,
I lose pieces,
become untethered,
cannot see a hopeful reality,
begin to question my existence
and that of all humanity.

Why all the noise –
the incessant chatter and mindless banter?

“Y’all gonna make me lose my mind
up in here, up in here.
Y’all gonna make me lose control
up in here, up in here.”

I will need to change my life
in order to save it.

Deprived of silence,
I feel my blood boiling,
heart racing,
hands tremblin’,
mind slipping.
I can taste that bitter, flimsy line
between love and hate;
that soft, raw space
where even the gentlest among us
can suddenly snap
and do things we can never take back.
The Devil isn’t over there-
No, it plays in us all
bidding we follow
and fall-
fall so hard and low,
we can barely stand up.

I will need to change my life,
re-claim it
in order to save it.

Exactly how to do so
overwhelms and scares –
the tide is seemingly so high.
Got to go deep inside,
to The Core
lean only on that which is Truth and pure.